A Lot To Be Mad About

I got a lot to be mad about – Solange

We are living in trying times. There is no doubt about that.

Gas is $177,000 per gallon.

Eggs are $923 per half dozen.

The ozone layer is a thing of the past.

Solange was right. We got a lot to be mad about.

But I think it is time we examine the anger and where we are placing it.

I have personally noticed an uptick in anger, cruelty, and mob mentality in online spaces, and I think we have to start dissecting it.

And first of all, it’s giving Twitter fingers, because if you wouldn’t say it to a person in real life, then why are you online talking crazy to folks?! As if they can’t find you. Nobody is as anonymous as they think they are. So please, I beg of you, CUT IT OUT.

But I want to talk about the bigger picture.

Everyone has a right to be angry, but what happens if we take a step back and examine what we are actually mad about? Because surely it is not actually each other.

We are mad at the economy, the job industry, our boss, our spouse, our lack of boundaries, the political atmosphere, the cost of concert tickets, the injustices of the world, Spirit Airlines going out of business, our loneliness; the list goes on.

And instead of addressing the problem at hand, we are (checks notes) attacking other people for having thoughts that do not align with ours? Hmmmm

We have lost the concept of having healthy dialogue and have resorted to tearing others down because they are different from us in thought, appearance, or lifestyle.

Write in your journal about it or keep it in your group chat, y'all. I promise you will be much better for it.

Disagreement is normal. Disagreement is healthy. You are supposed to encounter people who think differently than you do. But somewhere along the way, disagreement became disrespect, and disrespect became sport. Now if someone describes a movie or a book they didn’t love as much as you, it becomes a question of intellect or character.

“Oh, so you hate joy?”

“You probably don’t have friends.”

“This tells me everything I need to know about you.”

Does it, Susan?!

There are real things happening in our lives that make us feel powerless and you online screaming into the void, trying to be heard and gather the troops to tear somebody down because they said they didn't love the reboot of A Different World (I loved it but this ain't about me).

You cannot personally lower the cost of groceries. You cannot single-handedly fix the job market. You cannot force your company to give you a raise. You cannot make someone love you correctly. You cannot personally solve every injustice happening in the world.

But you can cuss somebody out in a comment section.

You can gather your friends.

You can screenshot their post and carry it somewhere else so everybody can discuss how stupid they are.

And for a moment,  that makes you feel powerful.

How much of what we call “holding people accountable” is actually us looking for somewhere socially acceptable to place our rage? How often are we participating in conversations because we genuinely want to exchange ideas, and how often are we waiting for somebody to say the wrong thing so we can unload?

We don’t want people to learn. We want them to be punished.

You are mad because there are things happening in this world that genuinely deserve your anger, but those things are enormous and complicated and difficult to fight.

And I want to encourage you to transmute that energy into something productive. Because you are not powerless. No, you cannot change everything, but you can do something.

Join your local city council. At least go to a meeting.

Petition the Department of Education for the change you know needs to happen.

Volunteer for a local nonprofit.

Become an advocate in your community for a cause you care about.

Be pissed and do something about it.

Stop hollering and cussing at strangers on the internet. Better yet, log off and go do something you care about.

Be mad about something meaningful and do something about it.

And here, I will yell at you.

GET IN THE FIELD.

With Love,

Dr. Brandi Nikkale