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  • Writer's pictureBrandi Nikkale

not always that girl

I woke up today and I just did not feel like that girl.

The baddie in me was still sleeping with the covers over her head and the shades drawn.

Unfortunately, Brandi, the career woman, student, and dog mom did not have that luxury.

I had to get up with or without my inner baddie being activated and maneuver the day without my typical badge of That Girl.

As the author of The Baddie Bylaws, it’s important for me to walk the talk and be who I encourage others to be. This being said, I allow myself to feel all the feels but it’s also important to me to create habits and strategies that help me cope with this feeling so that it doesn’t linger.

90% of life is confidence.And the thing about confidence is no one knows if it's real or not.” - Maddy, Euphoria

I don’t have the energy to see if there is scientific backing for this fact I am about to give ya’ll but I just know it. I’m a Cancer and I have great intuition. Trust me.

Being confident makes you 99% more attractive, likeable and increases your performance at a given task by 85%.

Did I just make those numbers up? Okay, who’s asking?!

With that being said, even when you are not feeling like that girl and you can’t find your confidence, it’s important to find something that resembles it and put it on.

Show up for yourself.

  1. Get dressed. I have been making it a goal to look good for myself every day. I don’t get “dressed up” but I like to feel sexy. I put on something flattering, I put my earrings on, I put on perfume, I do something decent to my hair. It only takes 10-15 minutes but it sets the tone for me to like what I see in the mirror. I know sometimes we are tempted to throw on our favorite comfort clothes that might look a little less favorable but I promise you it does not help you feel like the baddie you truly are.

  2. Pull up your Feel Good File. If you have read The Baddie Bylaws, you know exactly what I am talking about. If you have not read it, what are you waiting for? Anyhow, your Feel Good File is a folder on your phone or computer where you save screenshots or files of affirmation that you have received whether it’s a compliment in a text, an email of acknowledgement or a photo of yourself where you think you look TF GOODT! When you are having a down day, this will help to lift your spirits.

  3. Talk about it. You should have at least one friend that you can tell “I’m not feeling like it today. I feel....unsure about myself.” If this friend is a good one, they will either know or ask what you need in that moment. Maybe you need some affirmation but most of the time, we just need to feel heard and we need to know that we are not alone. Maybe we even need a good self-depreciating joke session. No matter what you need, it helps to just say it out loud.

  4. Fresh air. If you know me, you know this is my go-to. Fresh air and a touch of sun on the skin makes a physical, mental, spiritual and emotional difference. Don’t take my word for it. Try it for yourself. Even a 5 minute walk or opening the blinds and cracking the window will do the trick.

Comment and let me know what you typically do when you don’t feel like that girl.


Brandi Nikkale

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When I don't feel like "THAT GIRL" I cry lol Lately I've been telling myself that I can have anything I desire & that anything I feel is temporary & that helps the most

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